Dear Haverim,
I will be in California visiting my parents
and Elissa's mother, along with my family. During the time I am away, I was
hoping you might begin this Omer Count Meditation, so that together, we can work
on self-improvement during these 49 days between the Second Seder of
Passover and Shavuot. I found this set of meditations on the Chabad website and
they have served me very well over these past few years. I hope these
meditations will make each day meaningful. I will only give you those days
which we will be covering while I am away, and I will resume my postings upon my
return.
By the way, if you have already forgotten to
count, TONIGHT IS THE 2nd DAY of the OMER!
Warmly,
Rabbi Michael
With the mitzvah of counting the 49 days, known as Sefirat Ha'Omer, the
Torah invites us on a journey into the human psyche, into the soul. There are
seven basic emotions that make up the spectrum of human experience. At the root
of all forms of enslavement, is a distortion of these emotions. Each of the
seven weeks between Passover and Shavuot is dedicated to examining and refining
one of them.
The seven emotional attributes are:
- Chesed
― Loving-kindness
- Gevurah
― Justice and discipline
- Tiferet
― Harmony, compassion
- Netzach
― Endurance
- Hod
― Humility
- Yesod
― Bonding
- Malchut
― Sovereignty, leadership
The seven weeks, which represent these emotional attributes, further
divide into seven days making up the 49 days of the counting. Since a fully
functional emotion is multidimensional, it includes within itself a blend of all
seven attributes. Thus, the counting of the first week, which begins on the
second night of Pesach, as well as consisting of the actual counting ("Today is
day one of the Omer...") would consist of the following structure with suggested
meditations:
Upon conclusion of the 49 days we arrive at the 50th day ― Mattan Torah.
After we have achieved all we can accomplish through our own initiative,
traversing and refining every emotional corner of our psyche, we then receive a
gift ('mattan' in Hebrew) from above. We receive that which we could not achieve
with our own limited faculties. We receive the gift of true freedom ― the
ability to transcend our human limitations and touch the
divine.
Love is the single most powerful and necessary component in life. It is
both giving and receiving. Love allows us to reach above and beyond ourselves,
to experience another person and to allow that person to experience us. It is
the tool by which we learn to experience the highest reality ― God. Examine the
love aspect of your love.
Ask yourself: What is my capacity to love another person? Do I have
problems with giving? Am I stingy or selfish? Is it difficult for me to let
someone else into my life? Am I afraid of my vulnerability, of opening up and
getting hurt?
Exercise for the day: Find a new way to express your love to a dear
one.
Healthy love must always include an element of discipline and
discernment; a degree of distance and respect for another's boundaries; an
assessment of another's capacity to contain your love. Love must be tempered and
directed properly. Ask a parent who, in the name of love, has spoiled a child;
or someone who suffocates a spouse with love and doesn't allow them any personal
space.
Exercise for the day: Help someone on their terms not on yours. Apply
yourself to their specific needs even if it takes effort.
Harmony in love is one that blends both the chesed and gevurah aspects
of love. Harmonized love includes empathy and compassion. Love is often given
with the expectation of receiving love in return. Compassionate love is given
freely; expects nothing in return ― even when the other doesn't deserve love.
Tiferet is giving also to those who have hurt you.
Exercise for the day: Offer a helping hand to a
stranger.
Is my love enduring? Does it withstand challenges and setbacks? Do I
give and withhold love according to my moods or is it constant regardless of the
ups and downs of life?
Exercise for the day: Reassure a loved one of the constancy of your
love
You can often get locked in love and be unable to forgive your beloved
or to bend or compromise your position. Hod introduces the aspect of humility in
love; the ability to rise above yourself and forgive or give in to the one you
love just for the sake of love even if you're convinced that you're right.
Arrogant love is not love.
Exercise for the day: Swallow your pride and reconcile with a loved one
with whom you have quarreled.
For love to be eternal it requires bonding. A sense of togetherness
which actualizes the love in a joint effort. An intimate connection, kinship and
attachment, benefiting both parties. This bonding bears fruit; the fruit born
out of a healthy union.
Exercise for the day: Start building something constructive together
with a loved one
Mature love comes with ― and brings ― personal dignity. An intimate
feeling of nobility and regality. Knowing your special place and contribution in
this world. Any love that is debilitating and breaks the human spirit is no love
at all. For love to be complete it must have the dimension of personal
sovereignty.
Exercise for the day: Highlight an aspect of your love that has
bolstered your spirit and enriched your life...and
celebrate.
After the miraculous Exodus from Egypt, the Jewish people spent 49 days
preparing for the most awesome experience in human history ― the giving of the
Torah at Mount Sinai. Just as the Jewish peoples' redemption from Egypt teaches
us how to achieve inner freedom in our lives; so too, this 49-day period, called
'Sefirat Ha-Omer' the Counting of the Omer, is a time of intense character
refinement and elevation.
During this time, the aspect of the human psyche that most requires
refinement is the area of the emotions. The spectrum of human experience
consists of seven emotional attributes, or sefirot. This week we continue
Sefirat Ha'Omer, utilizing the seven dimensions of the seven emotional
attributes. The first week after Pesach was dedicated to examining the aspect of
chesed, loving-kindness. The second week corresponds to the emotional attribute
of gevurah, discipline or justice.
If love (Chesed) is the bedrock of human expression, discipline
(Gevurah) is the channel through which we express love. It gives our life and
love direction and focus. Gevurah ― discipline and measure ― concentrates and
directs our efforts, our love in the proper directions.
The underlying intention and motive in discipline is love. Why do we
measure our behavior, why do we establish standards and expect people to live up
to them ― only because of love. Chesed of gevurah is the love in discipline; it
is the recognition that your personal discipline and the discipline you expect
of others is only an expression of love. It is the understanding that we have no
right to judge others; we have a right only to love them and that includes
wanting them to be their best.
Ask yourself: when I judge and criticize another is it in any way tinged
with any of my own contempt and irritation? Is there any hidden satisfaction in
his failure? Or is it only out of love for the other?
Exercise for the day: Before you criticize someone today, think twice:
Is it out of concern and love?
Examine the discipline factor of discipline: Is my discipline reasonably
restrained or is it excessive? Do I have enough discipline in my life and in my
interactions? Am I organized? Is my time used efficiently? Why do I have
problems with discipline and what can I do to enhance it? Do I take time each
day for personal accounting of my schedule and
accomplishments?
Exercise for the day: Make a detailed plan for spending your day and at
the end of the day see if you've lived up to it.
Underlying and driving discipline must not only be love, but also
compassion. Compassion is unconditional love. It is love just for the sake of
love, not considering the others position. Tiferet is a result of total
selflessness in the eyes of God. You love for no reason; you love because you
are a reflection of God. Does my discipline have this element of
compassion?
Exercise for the day: Be compassionate to someone you have
reproached.
Effective discipline must be enduring and tenacious. Is my discipline
consistent or only when forced? Do I follow through with discipline? Am I
perceived as a weak disciplinarian?
Exercise for the day: Extend the plan you made on day two for a longer
period of time listing short-term and long-term goals. Review and update it each
day, and see how consistent you are and if you follow
through.
The results of discipline and might without humility are obvious. The
greatest catastrophes have occurred as a result of people sitting in arrogant
judgment of others. Am I arrogant in the name of justice (what I consider just)?
Do I ever think that I sit on a higher pedestal and bestow judgment on my
subjects below? What about my children? Students?
Exercise for the day: Before judging anyone, insure that you are doing
so selflessly with no personal bias
For discipline to be effective it must be coupled with commitment and
bonding. Both in disciplining yourself and others there has to be a sense that
the discipline is important for developing a stronger bond. Not that I
discipline you, but that we are doing it together for our mutual
benefit.
Exercise for the day: Demonstrate to your child or student how
discipline is an expression of intensifying your bond and commitment to each
other.
Discipline, like love, must enhance personal dignity. Discipline that
breaks a person will backfire. Healthy discipline should bolster self-esteem and
help elicit the best in a person; cultivating his sovereignty. Does my
discipline cripple the human spirit; does it weaken or strengthen me and
others?
Exercise for the day: When disciplining your child or student, foster
his self-respect
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